One More Chance
by MosquitoKid
Summary: Santana messes up big time with Brittany. But when fate steps in and gives her one more chance, will she redeem herself?
1. Hit Rewind

**A/N: So my other fic ("Dancing in the Dark") is currently on hiatus because I got hit with an idea which I think is better and I'd rather focus on that for now. So for those of you who were reading it, I'm sorry, but I really hope you like this one! I'm really new to this world of fan fiction, so comments are much appreciated. As is true with anything, fans are the most important part of art. **

Do you ever wish life had a rewind button? Like, have you ever fucked up _so _bad that you wish you could start over completely? I'll admit, I've made some mistakes in my life. But none of them compare to the way I treated her. She was the one thing in my life that brought me happiness. But I was too blind and selfish to see that. I thought alcohol made me happy. I thought letting him fuck me would make me feel special. Really, all it did was make her feel like shit. I would do anything to show her I can change, but does everyone deserve a second chance? Do _I _deserve a second chance? Maybe she deserves better than me. Scratch that. I know she does. Regardless, I am madly and undeniably in love with her and all that she is. And no amount of whiskey will ever ebb the desire I have for her.

…

"_You don't give a __**fuck**__, Santana!"_

_ Her words sat numbly on my mind. Being wasted out of your fucking mind makes it really hard to respond to things like that, I've found. I could see the tears forming in her normally sparkling blue eyes. They weren't sparkling right now._

_ "You don't even deny it. I have worked so hard to make this work. I have sacrificed so much for you, trying to make you see how special and great you are…" her voice broke. "…I love you so much and you don't even care."_

_ She fell to her knees and the sobs just started ripping out of her, wracking her entire body. I just watched. It was like seeing a horrible accident and not being able to look away. It hurt me to see her like that, but I couldn't bring myself to find the right words to say. "I love you" doesn't always work. This continued for a while. It seemed like an eternity before her sobs became small sniffles and shallow breaths. Then she uttered the words that obliterated my entire world: "I can't do this anymore. I have to go." She got up, walked out, and slammed the door behind her._

...

Santana awoke with a start. Her heart was racing and her body was coated with a fresh layer of sweat.

"_Not again…"_ she groaned into her pillow.

This was definitely not the first time she had had this dream. It was a nightmare that plagued her mind on a regular basis. It had been two years since Brittany had left. Two years of not hearing her sweet, angelic voice telling her to "stop tickling me." Two years of not feeling the warmth and passion of her love. Two years of not seeing her bright, shining face light up upon seeing Santana simply walk into the room. And every single day it killed Santana, remembering what she no longer had.

The night she left, Santana had gotten drunk, which wasn't unusual. But what she had done _while _she was drunk was unforgivable. She had been at a bar. Her and Brittany had gotten into a petty argument again. That happened a lot. Santana's old therapist always told her that it was because Santana was insecure about her own faults, so she'd just take it out on Brittany, the only one who would listen. Santana promptly told her therapist to "shut the fuck up" and that was the end of that theory. That night at the bar, she had run into her ex-boyfriend Noah "Puck" Puckerman. The night started off innocently enough. They had a couple drinks, reminisced about old times, caught up on their current lives. But then the sweet-talking started. Usually Santana was immune, but it had been a long time since she'd seen him and he _did _have a way with words. She was also feeling shitty about the fight with Britt. So she let him have his way with her.

Overcome with guilt and shame, she told Brittany immediately. And like her dream iterates, Brittany just up and left. She moved to New York to live with their mutual friend Rachel Berry. She became a dancer, traveling all over the world, making something of herself. Dating. That's what hurt Santana the most, was hearing from Rachel that Brittany was _dating_. Just because Santana hadn't had the guts to propose yet didn't mean she didn't love her. She loved her with all that she was. She just had a few problems with her life. Problems that landed her a boring-ass job as a secretary in an office building. Problems that prevented her from moving out of Lima, Ohio. Problems that pushed Brittany away from her.

Santana shook her head. She had to stop thinking those things or she'd be drunk at…three in the morning? Suddenly she remembered why she had woken up. Her phone had been vibrating incessantly. She picked it up.

_Twelve missed calls from Rachel Berry._

Santana's body froze with fear. Quickly, she dialed Rachel's number and waited for her to pick up. Each ring resounded throughout her being like a sledgehammer smashing her heart. Finally she picked up.  
>"Santana, you need to fly out here <em>now<em>. There's been an accident."


	2. With Those Words, My Dream Was Born

**A/N: If you are reading this, thank you. You guys rock! :)**

…

Have you ever had to tear yourself away from the thing you love most in the world? Like, every fiber in your body _screaming _at you to stay, not go? Everyone makes mistakes. But as far as I'm concerned, leaving her was not one of mine. While it's true that she loves me, sometimes she didn't love me _enough_. She didn't love me enough to stop drinking all of the time. She didn't love me enough to move out of Lima. She didn't love me enough to say no to Puck. I love her, but not enough to put _my _dreams on hold. Is that selfish? I'm not sure. Does she deserve a second chance? Who she used to be does, but who she's become…I'm not so sure. I'm afraid to try again. I don't think my heart can take it. Nevertheless, I will always love her and maybe someday, she'll get that chance she once deserved.

…

The roads were empty and it was late. Brittany had just left an after-party for one of the shows she'd performed in on Broadway and she was abuzz with the glow of stardom. Never in her wildest dreams would she have imagined herself actually _being_ in this position; getting to dance and sing onstage, living the dream that'd been born in high school. Well, it was only half the dream.

Suddenly, the glow evaporated as she remembered how she'd discovered that dream…

…

_ Santana and I had just done what would probably tarnish our pristine reputations forever: we had joined Glee club. Not that __**I **__really cared much about my reputation, but Santana sure did._

"_Brittany, we're freaking done for. Nobody's going to want us once they find out we hang out with the freaks and geeks club…" she grumbled, rolling over on my bed so she was face-down._

_ Despite her frustration, I giggled. She was cute when she pretended not to like something._

_ "Come on, San, I know you like it, even if it's just a little bit! It's not that bad and the people are kind of cool. Besides, you're totally an awesome singer and are gonna get all the solos," I consoled, putting a reassuring hand on my back._

_ It was silent for a little bit before she said something, but it wasn't an awkward silence. It was nice; we were just comfortable around each other like that._

_ "Do you like Glee club?" she finally asked._

_ "Yeah, I think I kind of do."  
>"Why?"<br>I'd never really thought about it before. We'd only been in it for a few weeks, but it was the one thing in the day I looked most forward to. Even more so than Cheerios practice._

_ "Hm…well, I've always sung in the shower and wished somebody could hear because sometimes I sing what I'm feeling and…well, that just doesn't mean a lot when nobody's around to hear it, right? And…I love to dance, Santana. If I could, I would do it forever. I feel…free when I'm dancing. Like no matter what people think of me outside of that, they will see the real me in the way I move. And…yeah, I guess that's why," I replied._

_ It was quiet again. She was thinking. I loved telling Santana everything about me because she always paid attention and told me what she thought. Like, what she __**really **__thought. She was always honest._

_ "Britt," she finally said, waking me from my reverie. She was sitting now, facing towards me. "I think that's…beautiful. Hearing that makes me wish I could always see the good in things like you do. I always feel like I can only see the bad…"_

"_But you see the good in me, right?" I interjected. She smiled._

"_Yes, but that's only because there is absolutely __**nothing**__ wrong with you. You're…perfect."_

_ Then she did something I will never forget. She took my face in both her hands and…kissed me. It wasn't sexy or passionate, it was…sweet. And romantic. But this wasn't supposed to happen with two girls, was it? When she pulled away, we just stared at each other, not fully registering what had happened. She looked flushed, like she'd just did something embarrassing. But I didn't think it was embarrassing at all. It felt…right._

"_Thank you," I finally uttered._

"_Yeah…no problem," she stammered._

_Then it was silent again. This silence was less comfortable, but then she said something that made it all okay:_

"_Brittany, someday you are going to sing and dance on Broadway. I will make sure you dance for the rest of your life and no matter where you go, I will always be sitting in the front row."_

_And with those words, my dream was born._

…

Brittany suddenly snapped out of her memories as she spotted something in the middle of the road. What it was, she didn't have time to register so she just swerved out of the way and screeched to a halt on the side of the road. Her hands gripped the steering wheel so tight, her knuckles had turned ghostly pale. She stared out into the open, shocked with fear. Once she finally collected her wits, she noticed that something had fallen into her lap. Shaky hands removing themselves from the steering wheel, she picked it up and examined it. It was the picture of her and Santana at their senior year Valentine's dance seven years ago.

Suddenly, she was hit with a wave of sadness her eyes started welling with tears that had been waiting to come out for two years. What had happened to them? Why had they given up so easily on their dreams? Santana had the voice, she could have made it. But more importantly, why had Santana given up on Brittany? That thought alone sent Brittany into an inconsolable state of misery and she started sobbing with every ounce of pain inside of her. They had tried so hard to make it work in the beginning, what had happened to make Santana stop loving her?

All of a sudden, Brittany heard the sound of something honking. She turned around quickly and saw a semi-truck barreling around the corner. It had lost control. Brittany felt the universe slam into her and everything went black.


	3. Graduation

Santana's stomach dropped to the floor. Or at least it felt that way.

"An accident? With Brittany? What kind of accident? Like, a paper cut kind of accident? Is she pregnant? Or is she…" Santana choked on the sob that was threatening to escape. Tears were already stinging her eyes. "Spit it out, hobbit!"

"Santana, you need to calm down. She's alive but…it's hard to explain. I'd rather you just come down here right now. Call me when you're at JFK, I'll pick you up," Rachel replied.

"Okay, sorry. See you soon." She pressed the end button and stared blankly at her cell phone. Was this really happening? Brittany was…well, nothing could hurt her. That was just unjust; she was the most pure, innocent being alive. Or was she? Santana hadn't talked to her for two years. Maybe she'd changed.

Santana shook her head. She needed to stop asking questions and book the first flight to New York she could find.

…

Within two hours, Santana was sitting coach on the shittiest plane she'd ever been on. This was definitely _not _like when the Glee club had gone to New York for nationals their junior year of high school. And finally being able to sit had made Santana realize how tired she was. But more than that…it made her realize how terrified she was of what she might find.

As scared as she was, Santana needed to stay calm. So many thoughts were coursing through her head, but the main one was this: she was about to see Brittany for the first time in two years. What would she be like? Would she be totally and completely mangled? Would she be absolutely fine? Would she look just as beautiful as she had when she left? Of course she would. No matter what, that's something that would never change. But how would she treat her?

Santana's insides churned in anxious anticipation. They had _not _separated on good terms. Maybe this was a bad idea. Maybe she should just get on the next flight back to Ohio once she landed and assume that Rachel would take care of everything…

Santana physically slapped her face a couple of times. Why was she being so stupid? It was just Brittany. She had already smashed her heart into a million tiny pieces, what worse could she do now? Nothing.

Santana sighed. She suddenly felt a strong yearning for the days when her and Brittany were happy and just beginning their lives together. She used to feel these yearnings all of the time but eventually, she learned to just push them down, deep inside. The pain was just too much. Now that she was about to see her, though, she started thinking back to when Brittany and her had just graduated…

…

"_I now present to you William McKinley High School's class of 2012!" announced Principal Figgins excitedly._

_ About a hundred graduation caps immediately erupted into the air as the audience clapped with raucous applause. I'd never felt so…accomplished before. My whole family thought I didn't give a shit about graduating but here I was, unable to wipe the stupid grin on my face, laughing and hugging all of my nerdy friends from Glee with a diploma in my hand. As much as I loved them all, there was really only one person I wanted to see right now._

_ I made my way through the swarming crowd, trying to find the beautiful blue-eyed graduate I was proud to call mine. Eventually, I spotted her, hugging and crying Mike and Tina. I just stopped and watched for a little bit because it was so indescribably astounding the way she looked right now. If I thought __**I **__felt accomplished, Brittany must be feeling a hundred times more so. She almost didn't graduate because of grades but with a lot of help from me and the Asians, she passed._

_ Suddenly, she caught my eyes. She must have known I'd been staring because her face broke out into the biggest grin I'd ever seen, complete with the reddest blush I'd ever seen. She was…beautiful. She broke the hug with Mike and Tina and practically sprinted towards me, not caring about the people she was pushing out of her way. She slammed her body into mine and we hugged for a solid minute, just holding each other and crying tears of joy._

_ "Britt, your speech was amazing. I am so proud to be able to say I'm your First Lady," I said with a wink._

_ "I wouldn't have been able to balance everything without you, San. You are my inspiration for everything. For passing those classes, for writing that speech, and most importantly, for giving me the courage and strength to embark on this journey we're about to experience," she expressed through tears._

_ How did I get so lucky?  
>"Brittany, I love you so much." And I took her face in both my hands and kissed her. There was so much love and passion in that kiss, I will never in my entire life forget it. In that one kiss held all of our past, being replaced by the hopes and dreams for what we would hope would be our bright future…together.<em>

…

_"Passengers, please fasten your seatbelts, we are about to descend."_

Santana snapped out of her reverie. Were they already in New York?

Her heart started to palpitate all of a sudden. This was really about to happen. She was really about to see the love of her life for the first time in two years. And she had absolutely no idea what to expect.

…

"Santana!"

Santana spun around. There was Rachel. She started walking towards her but Rachel was so excited to see her, she ran over and embraced her in the tightest hug Santana had felt in a long time.

Santana wheezed. "Nice to see you too, Berry. But could you let me go? I think you deflated my implants," she squeaked out.

"Oh, yes, of course, I'm sorry. I'm just…really glad to see you. I've missed you. I've missed everyone. It's been so long since we've seen each other. I think the last time I saw you was at Finn and I's wedding? And that was what, five years ago? Holy cow, Santana, it's been so long! What is wrong with – "

"Alright, I'm gonna stop you right there, Berry. I'm not really known for keeping in touch. Also, my life hasn't exactly been ideal as of late, so if you would, can we please go to the hospital now?" Santana snapped. She was tired and Rachel was still annoying.

"Oh, yes, of course! I'm sorry. I left Quinn to watch Brittany while I picked you up, so she's okay. Just…be prepared. You're going to be really shocked."

…

The car ride mostly consisted of Rachel jabbering on and on about what had been going on the last five years. Most of their phone calls had consisted of updates on Brittany and that was it. Santana didn't really care about what everyone else was doing, but maybe she should have. Maybe then she wouldn't feel so alone all the time.

"Finn is really busy right now, his construction crew is working on building the set for _Wicked _this spring! Isn't that amazing? And Quinn's a lawyer, a very successful one. She's actually in the middle of a trial having to do with child abuse right now! Very exciting. Mike and Tina are having fun with their dance studio, Artie's directing a new play he's just written…"

But Santana was barely listening. She was nervous as hell about seeing Brittany still. And it wasn't the greatest of comforts listening to how successful everyone had become while she had just stayed in Lima and gotten wasted.

"Santana?"

"What?" Santana barked. That came out a little harsher than she had wanted it to.

"I was just asking what you have been up to lately?" Rachel asked softly.

What was she supposed to tell her? She had a job that she hated more than anything? That she had given up on all her dreams for no reason other than the bottle? That she was alone and not even her family wanted to talk to her?

"Not a lot. Just sort of…living. One day at a time sort of thing. Look, when are we going to get there?"

"We're here." Santana's heart leapt into her throat.

…

The sound of her heartbeat seemed to echo off of the white, sterilized walls of the hospital. Was she sweating? Could Berry hear her heartbeat? She really didn't care at the moment. She felt like she was going to pass out. Finally, she and Rachel had reached the door with the clipboard reading "Brittany Susan Pierce" tagged on.

"Are you sure you can handle this?" Rachel asked.

Santana gulped. Then she inhaled deeply, closed her eyes, and exhaled. It was just Brittany. She wasn't scary, she was just…beautiful. A beautiful, beautiful creature who never wanted to hurt anyone.

"Yes…I'm ready." Santana stated.

Rachel opened the door and led her inside. Santana's eyes immediately caught Quinn sitting in a chair next to a hospital bed. She still looked perfect, but nobody ever though Quinn Fabray would become ugly. But Santana barely had time to really even think about Quinn being there. Because lying in the bed next to her was Brittany, still just as beautiful as the night she had left. Her body was slightly bruised and her face looked tired, but she was still flawless. And her eyes…

Santana's breath caught in her breath. Brittany's eyes were focused intently on Santana's, sparkling with interest and curiosity.

"Santana?" she squeaked.

"Yes…?" Santana managed to squeeze out. She walked towards Brittany, stopping at the side of the bed. Brittany stared at her for a few seconds and all of a sudden squealed with the most enthusiasm Santana thought she had _ever_ heard. Brittany leapt up out of her bed and hugged Santana tightly, almost knocking the breath out of her.

Santana was instantly confused. Why wasn't she slapping her? Or some other violent act that Santana surely deserved?  
>"Britt, what happened to you?" she asked. Brittany pulled out of the hug and scrunched up her face, obviously trying to remember something.<p>

"Honestly…I can't remember. The last thing I remember is all of us hanging out after graduation. Did I get hit by a car or fall off a ladder or something?"

Santana's eyes grew wide. She turned around and stared at Quinn and Rachel with baffled questioning in her eyes.

If this was really happening, it seemed as though Brittany couldn't remember anything that had happened after their graduation ceremony.


	4. Crossing That Bridge

**A/N: Thank you to all who are still reading! I'm going to try to update about every week. Also, BRITTANA KISSED. That is all.**

…

"Is something wrong?"

Santana turned her head around to wear Brittany was lying. She was still processing being able to look at her again, but to have _that _sort of bombshell dropped on her too? It was just…too much. She had to get out of there.

"I've gotta go," she stated. She quickly spun around and started to march towards the door. Quinn, Brittany, and Rachel all stared at her departing figure.

"What's the matter with her?" Brittany asked, pain lacing her words.

"Oh, she's just had…she's on her period," Quinn offered. "I'll go talk to her."

Quinn hurried out of the room and caught Santana in the hallway, pacing the floor. Once Santana realized Quinn was with her, she practically sprinted towards her and violently grabbed her shoulders.

"What the FUCK happened?" Santana yelled.

"CALM DOWN," Quinn yelled back, with just as much force as Santana. Santana's eyes widened and she immediately stopped.

"I'm sorry, just…somebody needs to tell you to stop freaking out or you'll go insane," Quinn apologized.

"It's okay, Fabray. I'm just…like…I don't even know…" Santana stuttered.

"I know, trust me. Come on, I'll buy you a cup of coffee."

…

About twenty minutes later, Quinn and Santana were seated at a small table in the hospital's little café. Santana all of a sudden realized she hadn't seen Quinn in years…

"Thanks for the coffee, Quinn. It's been a while. I…miss you. I miss our friendship. I'm sorry…" Santana mumbled. She wasn't very good at apologies.

Quinn smiled. "It's alright. I miss you too. We all do. But we can catch up later. I'm sure you're anxious to know what happened to Brittany…"

"Yeah, I think that'd be helpful," Santana replied, a small smile playing upon her lips. Quinn knew just how to handle Santana's attitude, it was hard to hate her small attempts at joking.

"Okay. Well, she was driving back from a performance and somehow got slammed by a semi. The truck driver was unscathed, so he immediately checked out Brittany. She was unconscious, but didn't seem severely injured, so he called the ambulance. She had to have a few stiches and she cracked a couple ribs, but that was it. Well, with the exception of her…her…amnesia, I guess is what you'd call it. Only, she hasn't forgotten who she is or who we are. She just…can't remember anything past our graduation party seven years ago," Quinn explained.

Santana stared, mouth agape, eyes aghast with disbelief and barely understanding. Was this really happening?  
>"So…Brittany thinks that…she and I…are…"<p>

"Still together? Yes. And she won't shut up about you either," Quinn said with a smirk.

Santana felt like she wanted to throw up. And cry. And run a marathon. All at the same time. Brittany still thought they were together. As far as she knew, they were just about to begin their lives together. Santana's drinking problem hadn't progressed, they hadn't rented their first apartment yet, they hadn't experienced anything that could put a damper on their wild and beautiful plans together. Santana could finally have that one more chance she'd always wanted…

"But," Quinn interjected, interrupting her reverie. "There's no telling when she's going to get her memory back."

"Wait, _when_? So it's inevitable?" Santana asked.

"Well, according to the doctors. It could be days, weeks, months, years even. But it _will _come back."

Santana's heart sunk. Brittany would hate her again once she regained her memory. But then, for the first time in years, Santana felt hope. Yes, Brittany may get her memory back. But until that happens, Santana would have to use every ounce of love and strength within her to make Brittany see that she still loved her and wanted to be with her. She would do everything within her power to show Brittany she could change. And if Brittany still couldn't see that in the end…well, what could she do?

Quinn stared quietly while Santana processed all of the information.

"Look," she interrupted. "I know what you're thinking. You want to have one more chance to get her back. Santana…that's not a good idea. I know it's tempting, but she deserves to know the truth. It's not fair for you to lie-"  
>"Shut your mouth, Fabray. Just because we haven't talked in forever doesn't mean you can just start up with the telling me what to do all the time. We're not sophomores in high school, alright? I will tell Brittany whatever I damn well want to," Santana snapped.<p>

"I'm not trying to control you. I'm only looking out for _you_, Santana. If she finds out what you're doing…she'll hate you even more," Quinn pleaded earnestly.

Santana started. She hadn't thought about that. Tricking Brittany into believing nothing bad had happened between them would be the ultimate act of betrayal. Brittany would hate her for lying. But something inside Santana told her it was the right thing to do. She knew deep in her heart of hearts that Brittany still loved her. And if Brittany becomes upset when she gets her memory back…well, Santana would just cross that bridge when she came to it.


	5. Strange Feelings and Dreams

_ Everything is foggy and I feel really lost. It smells like alcohol. I hear the sound of a semi horn honking in the distance. It feels like it's coming closer. I'm getting scared, so I take off running to who knows where. My footsteps crash and echo like a bunch of pots and pans falling out of a cabinet. I don't know who or what I'm running from, but the sound of my feet scares me even more. They make me feel like whatever it is will have no trouble finding me._

_ "Santana!" I scream. I don't know why I scream, it just makes more noise. I guess I just really want her to protect me. So I keep screaming her name until I trip and fall on the ground. The horn is still honking and everything is still foggy so I just curl up in a ball and start crying. I don't know how long I'm on the floor for, but eventually I hear small footsteps coming my way. I look up and see a dark shape coming towards me. My insides are frozen with fear but I can't bring myself to move. So I just tuck my head in my arms and sit there. Suddenly I feel cold hands on my shoulders. The hands bring me up to look and it's Santana. She looks sad and hollow. And her hands are cold. This isn't how she normally feels._

_ "Brittany…" she whispers. I open my mouth to speak but nothing comes out._

_ "Brittany…" she repeats. She keeps saying it over and over and over…_

…

"Brittany…"

Brittany woke with a start. That had to be the weirdest dream ever. She blinked sleepily a few times until she saw Santana hovering over her, stroking her hair. She smiled a huge grin.

"Hey. Do you feel better?" she asked Santana. Brittany didn't know for sure, but it seemed like a small flash of pain hit Santana's face when she asked that.

"Yeah, I'm sorry, for how I acted earlier. It's just…I was really stressed out over what happened and I'm tired and there's so much I have to plan and-"  
>"Shh," Brittany put a finger to Santana's lips to silence her. "It's okay, I forgive you." She flashed Santana an innocent smile and Santana returned the favor. Brittany really wanted to kiss her but felt too tired and weak to reach up to her.<p>

"So you ready to get out of here?" Santana asked with a grin. Brittany squealed.

"Really? I can leave?" she inquired excitedly.

"Just about. You're going to have to stay here one more night, but tomorrow afternoon you're free to go!" Santana replied.

"That's great! Where are we going?" Brittany asked innocently. Okay, Brittany could have sworn a small look of panic flashed across Santana's face when she asked _that_.

"H-home, of course! I-I guess you, uhm, don't remember? We have an apartment with Rachel and Finn!" she responded shakily.

"Oh, really? Wow, I must have hit my head pretty hard. How long have we lived there? Are Finn and Rachel married?" Brittany questioned.

"Uhm…" Santana paused. "You did hit your head pretty hard. I'm surprised you even remember me! A lot happened after graduation…I guess you just don't remember anything!" she answered with a nervous smile. "I can fill you in later when we're back, safe and sound? Okay? Right now, you need to rest up for our big day tomorrow."

"Okay," Brittany complied. She smiled up at Santana, her eyes sparkling with love and trust. Santana smiled back, hesitantly. Then she slowly leaned down and softly embraced Brittany's lips with her own, in a kiss that was both tender and uncertain. It was a weird feeling for Brittany, usually their kisses were full of passion and need for one another. But maybe Santana was just being gentle because of the accident.


End file.
